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These Lamps Prove You Can’t Judge A Product By Its Listing
If you just read the Amazon listing for these table lights, you would think they were garbage, if they even exist at all.
To start, the selling points are offset in the infamous “lenticular brackets,” immediately signaling to the potential consumer that the seller lacks basic familiarity with English-language punctuation. If only the problems ended there. The details themselves are so abstruse and poorly worded, that they require several readings and re-readings in order to be fully understood. For example:
💕 【Modern Style & Easy to Install】Appearance not only to retain strong American style and quality, but also has modern style and innovation, we hope the good product quality to win the trust of consumers and love. The lamps has dimmable features, which can easy to choose the suitable brightness. Easy installation in 3 mins or less. ✅ 【Note】When you received the goods, please screw off the ring on the bulb base first. Put the lampshade on it. Then screw on the ring again to fit the threads.
To the seller’s credit, it is clear from the bracketed text that the above text in some way refers to the lamps’ modern style and easily installation. But I would find those supposed assets more believable if I had not been forced to read string of words to follow. If your main product is light fixtures, the last thing you want to do is give your customers a headache.
The copy is no better when it appears on the product’s images. I’m pretty sure even Google Translate could come up with something better than “Widely Applications”:
Perhaps most devastating, the company that makes these lamps, ZEEFO, has an entire dedicated Amazon storefront. The marketing folks obviously put in a lot of work trying to build their brand on The Everything Store. And yet, this is their company description:
ZEEFO has always been the concept of lighting exquisite, producing quality lighting items.We believe everyone should add some aesthetics comf feeling at home.
With the mention of aesthetics and stream-of-consciousness writing, this seems more likely to have been produced by James Joyce than a team of business professionals.
All this is to say, these lamps are actually incredible. Somehow in the description detailing how it “not only to retain strong American style,” the copywriters missed the word “minimalist,” but that is exactly what these are. They are sleek (another curiously absent adjective) and fit in nicely with modern home décor.
Furthermore, they correctly convey they gist when they mention “The touch control features is a good convenient design.You are no need to unplug the power socket every time when you go to bed or getting up to flip a switch.” I’m not sure how many people have lamps they need to unplug to turn off, but reaching for the switch can be a real hassle, and the fact that you can turn these lamps on and off by simple touch is a genuine improvement. The same can be said for the three levels of brightness you can toggle through in order to get the right amount of light.
For some reason, the best feature of the lamps is mentioned twice in the product’s title, then ignored in its bullet points. I am talking about the USB ports and power outlet. Each lamp has two USB ports and one outlet, providing more than enough power for your electronic needs. Whether you are using it to charge your phone at night or to watch movies on your laptop or iPad before you go to sleep, this is a much more convenient source of power than a random spot on the wall somewhere behind your bed.
As you can guess from that paragraph, these lamps work great on nightstands, where we have them in my house. But those same qualities also make them a good fit for a side table in the living room or even on your desk in the study. If you were hesitant about these lamps because of the lack of care put into the listing, you can put your worries to rest. The lamps really are of good quality, and if they keep making product like this, we may one day actually care about the ZEEFO brand.