Why Does The Snactiv Snacking Utensil Even Exist?

Over 13 seasons, there have been some truly wild products pitched on Shark Tank. Typically the sharks pass on the most ridiculous ones; but every once in a while, especially when there is a celebrity guest shark, a seemingly inane idea will get funding. This is the only explanation I can think of for the success of Snactiv, which has now landed on the list of Amazon #1 new releases.

SNACTIV – Dark Mode – The Official Snacking Tool of the Future, as seen on Shark Tank! — $15

The Snactiv is the type of product Hollywood screenwriters concoct to poke fun at entrepreneur culture and lazy Americans. It is the quintessential dumb idea, surely generated amidst a haze of pot smoke in a brainstorming session that could only have ended with the exclamation, “We are gonna be rich!” The Snactiv is, more or less, a pair of plastic chopsticks that also happen to be less useful than chopsticks. This novel utensil is not meant to help you consume Chinese delicacies like fried rice or noodles. Instead, you clip it onto your hand with the intended function of grasping one Cheeto at a time.

Here is the elevator pitch from an admittedly funny YouTube video introducing the product: As a future descendent of chopsticks, we’ve created a non-permanent body modification that keeps your hands clean and your focus on the things that actually matter.

I can see two legitimately useful purposes for the Snactiv. The first is as a gag gift—the kind of trinket that may well stuff a stocking and merit a chuckle only to be discarded or regifted soon after. The second is as a sort of weight control method. If you tell yourself you can only snack by means of this ridiculous gadget, then you may as well not eat at all. The number of people who will use this willingly and contentedly is approximately zero.

Tell me I’m wrong. Would you ever be caught dead with one of these things on your hand?